author:tistyjoe providence relapse text


My breath quickened.
My vision tunneled.
My fists flew.

The speed bag bounced back and forth. Faster and faster. I kept hitting and hitting and hitting. The ringing in my ears was so loud, I couldn't hear anything else. Not that it mattered. The screams had stopped a while ago. I unzipped the speed bag and out poured ten foals. Ten little sacks of blood and broken bones. None of them were moving. I distributed them amongst the cages, enough for each food bowl. "There's your dinner, shitbags!" The fluffies all cowered as far from me as they could. Could you blame them?

I'd cower from me too.

I started walking slowly, cage to cage. When I stopped in front of a cage with two fluffies and their two remaining babies, they knew their time was up. Before I even reached into the cage, the 'mummah' bit the head off of one of her foals, tears streaming down her face as she choked down her baby. They knew it was a quicker and much cleaner death that what I had in store for them. As she mercy killed one foal, the daddy fluff took care of the other. He smashed the little thing's head into the floor, not stopping even when the foal's head was nothing but mush. Two fluffies dead, and I hadn't raised a finger. The couple looked up at me, defiance in their eyes. A smile creeped onto the corners of my mouth, and I turned and walked away from the cage. As I was leaving the 'guest' room, the two brave parents realized what they had done, and what I hadn't. Their sobs and wails echoed throughout my apartment. I laid down on my bed, a lumpy misshapen couch, and slipped to sleep to the screams of heartbroken fluf-


I gasped awake in a cold sweat, with screams still echoing in my head.

I was in my bed. An actual bed in my house. Dead silence wafted through the house.

"God fucking damnit..." I looked at my phone. 3:42 am. I didn't even bother trying to go back to sleep. I got out of bed and headed down the hall to the kitchen. On the way, I stop at a door. A plain, innocent looking door. I carefully and quietly cracked it open, peeking in.

There he was. Providence. Asleep in his little bed. With his little blanket. And his little fucking pathetic stupid ass stuff-


I gently shut the door and continued to the kitchen. I started making some coffee and turned on the tv. Scrolling through the usual trite and hogwash, I settled for silence and turned the tv off. I poured a cup of coffee, sat at the kitchen table, and stared into the dark brown liquid. I stared at it, looking deeper and deeper, wondering the whole time, if Nietzche was right. The abyss didn't seem to be too forthcoming with answers. I took a sip of the coffee and went back to staring, drifting off into my thoughts of...


...violence. Pure ultra-violence. That's the only thing that could describe what I was doing. Fluffies ran all around me, screaming and shitting. My arms were soaked in blood up past my elbows. I stomped left and right, crushing a fluffy with each step. I picked up a mare and ripped her in half, showering both myself and the few stupid fluffies that tried to hide from me behind my own legs with a spray of gore and half formed fetuses. My laugh cut through the screams and the chaos. I dropped the mare halves and stomped my way out of the room. Nature was calling. I opened the door to my bathroom and heard whimpering and sobbing. I had forgotten about these fucks. I had thrown them into my bathtub shower about a day and a half ago. A mummah and her three babies. I turned on the light and they all started babbling and chirping at me. Opening the shower door, they all looked at me, the mummah standing on her hind legs, begging "Upsies daddeh? Fwuffy need hugs and nummies...Babbehs need miwkies and- AGGHHH!" Before the dumb bitch could continue, I blasted her right in the mouth with a steady stream of piss. Her foals tried to scramble to her, but I washed them back with my piss. I focused on one of the little shits, drowning him right then and there. As the three remaining fluffies coughed and threw up all the piss they had involuntarily swallowed, I turned on the shower on full cold and shut the shower door. Laughing and turning out the bathroom light, I slammed the door behind me and returned to the fun room, ready to-


I snapped back to reality. Sighing, I took a sip of my coffee and almost spit it out. It was ice cold. Looking at the clock on the stove, the time read 7:23 am. Had I really spaced out for that long? I dumped out the cold coffee and was getting ready to make a new cup when I saw them. A herd. In my back-fucking-yard. The typical smarty was enfing a baby as the rest were devouring every soft plant they could find. I felt my blood pressure spike. I could see myself eviscerating this herd. I heard a soft knocking and pleading, begging for his breakfast and-

For the second time in less than 5 minutes, I snapped back to reality out of a daydream. I turned from the window and calmly walked back to the safe room. Opening the door, I found Providence, sitting, looking up at me with his big expressive eyes. Sighing and smiling, I picked him up and held him close to me. He started cooing, burrowing his head in my chest and trying his best to wrap his little legs around me. Suddenly, he perked up "Pwovi heaw fwuffies!" So could I. Something was screaming from the back yard. Something that desperately needed me to kill it. Something that needed to be truly hurt, deep down to its cor-

STOP! This isn't you. This isn't what you've got a fluffy right here...smash its fucking skull open. Rip its guts out. Make it cry...

I quickly put Providence down KILLHIM and went about our usual morning routine SMASHIT

I emptied out his SKINHIM litter box
I opened the RIPHIM curtains to let in some light
I filled his food bowl BEATHIM and water bottle

I told him he was a DISGUSTINGPIECEOFSHIT good fluffy and that I would KILLANDRAPEHISCORPSE be back later and we would TEARHIMINSIDEOUT play and have sketties. He bounced around, excited as could be, before hugging my leg and proclaiming me to be the best daddy ever.

I gave him a quick pat on the head and practically ran out of the safe room. I knew what was about to happen. And I knew I couldn't stop it.

I returned to the kitchen and turned on the sink. I splashed cold water on my face and looked out into the backyard again. I saw the smarty eating the baby he had just been raping.

Sighing, I knew the answer to my own question from earlier. Nietzsche was wrong. The abyss doesn't stare back. Turns out, it's just a fucking mirror.
Uploader TistyJoe,
Tags author:tistyjoe providence relapse text
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- Reply
TistyJoe: Turns out, if I just keep drinking, I can keep writing. I'm still not sure where this is all going, but I keep having little ideas and expanding and building upon them. Hope you enjoy this one.
- Reply
Anonymous1: you okay, friend?
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TistyJoe: @Anonymous: Golden. I'm figuring out why these little non-existent bastards are so captivating one story at a time. I think it's something between a cathartic fantasy and a Machiavellian power trip. Too often, we just see the stories from the view of the fluffy. The violence exuded upon them. I want to figure out more why we all like this shit. Why we want to see little innocent creatures murdered, when in real life most likely none of us would come even close to this. It's really fucking bizarre, but I'm having a blast.
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Anonymous2: This here is the good, dark, and heavy shit!
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Anonymous3: I like this story. The effect of heavy-abuse on the human psyche is a nice touch and the way the main character feels like an alcoholic going through withdrawal is damn good.

If I don't know you, but after reading this I would guess you recovered from something in the past, because it was exactly like this.

You move on, You got better, and it likes to remind you that you are stuck here forever.
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Anonymous4: "The abyss doesn't stare back. Turns out, it's just a fucking mirror.'

Dude, that was profound.
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Fluffy_Angst: @TistyJoe:

Thank you for exploring this. I can't even finish one of Eegor's flash games because the tortured screams are too pitiful. But I'll gladly draw Fluffy torture.

You are right though. While you are exploring, jut remember to take care of yourself. It's okay to pull back if things get too deep.

That's just my two cents but I'm a random stranger on the internet.

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Chocolatechilla: I wish I was that good of a writer. Loved this

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Gmonty: @TistyJoe: That's very deep. Like it.
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Anonymous5: holy shit, i fucking love this story, i need more
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Anonymous6: A+ sir, keep up the good work.