tagme tagyourownshit


Flufficide: the mean streets

Louie found out more about his new partner’s background. Carter was a rich kid!

But more, he had also ran an unregulated fluffy mill. Health and safety guidelines weren’t as such ignored but completely unbothered with. He sold fluffies to be abused and beaten. There was no problem until he decided to sell them as meat.

He did this at his frat house at college. He was kicked out and nearly went to prison.

Just as well Carter Carmichael IV kept him out with his fortune. But unfortunately for Carter V, he was made the black sheep of the family.

Louie would’ve been pissed if he didn’t find that it was completely hilarious. A rich kid who ran a fluffymill, now working for shit wages as an exterminator. Isn’t it ironic, don’t you think?

Alanis was on the radio, and it was that song, Louie and Carter were driving to an alleyway. There were reports of an old vagrant and a herd of fluffies pestering people for food.

Dumpsters raided and food littered everywhere, poopies and other unmentionable bodily fluids and unknown substances around restaurants.

Trying to sell the feral fluffies on for food, using them to try and steal food. More than healthy and public safety laws were violated.

The list was pretty long from there.

Why not the cops? Because fluffies were involved. And they would need to be disposed of.

They drove past the abandoned nursery they had previously gassed the large herd in. Same neighbourhood, Louie wasn’t faintly surprised, he was glad it would be a smaller job.

They had found the spot, the alleyway were the old guy was sighted. It must have been at least 7pm, everyone else wanted to be elsewhere, the streets were quiet.

They left the truck and set up some equipment. Carter wondered out loud if they were going to keep their equipment long around here. Louie told him to keep quiet.

Carter had looked all over the spot. He couldn’t help but feel it was a shithole, perfect for shitrats. He wasn’t too surprised that homeless guys would be here too. He was lit up a cigarette and kept the cattle prod ready in his left hand he knew he’d get some action here.

Vagrants and homeless people often took in the fluffies that they found on the streets.

No one could figure out why.

Food was a commodity to fight for! Homeless guys could easily overpower a herd. So why take them in? Why share the food? How can they even provide for them?

Both men ventured into the alley. It was still light thankfully but darkness was drawing in. Their last job before clocking off. The alley stunk of shit. Fluffy shit is very potent and the stink can make the inside of your nose itch, and can feel very uncomfortable. Neither men had their gas masks on.

A young man had been walking down the alley. He looked fairly pleased with himself. Until he caught sight of Louie and Carter. He went white and ran the opposite way. Neither were police and they wondered what his problem was.

At least he was out of the way now.

They found the vagrant. An old man, coated in filth, he was counting some crisp and clean dollars. They were the only things that were clean about him. The herd of fluffies was here too. A male, 2 female, a dam, and a few foals of all sizes. Louie counted at least 11. The old man looked alarmed at their presence.

“What the fuck do you want?!” The man growled.

“Sir we’ve come to ask you a few questions sir.” Louie politely replied.

“Bullshit. You’re exterminators and certainly not police. You can’t do me for anything. Certainly not vagrancy! I’ve got keys in my pocket” (the old man lifted them out and began to jangle. He was certainly homeless, they were car keys)

“My questions are to do with your fluffies sir. Assuming they're yours. We’ve had a number of reports about you.”

“like fucking what?”

“Indeed it wasn’t you fucking anything was it?”

“And what are you accusing me of? I don’t even have to answer you!”

“We’re not police, we are responsible for maintained public health and safety standards. And we believe the fluffies in your possession are dangerous to the health of the public at large. My questions relate to the accusations that-”

The old man began to cackle loudly, his hoarse throat let out a laughing fit of disdain and disgust. The fluffies confused by his laughing began to giggle too. The foals began to make dances with their hooves to join in the merriment the old man was having. A fluffy looked up and asked if she could sing daddy a song.

Louie cleared his throat, he looked more bemused now. He had to hide his anger now.

“Sir, you may find it hilarious that you’re putting the public’s health at risk with your behaviour. You’ve been reported as breaking dumpster locks to retrieve food for your fluffies. You’re not cleaning up their droppings and you’re not keeping them clean. You’re harassing people in the street, threatening them with assault with fluffy faeces. You’re allowing your fluffies to mate and breed without a license-“

The old man leered with a grin.

“-you’ve also been accused of prostituting your fluffies.”

The old man’s jaw dropped. From a twisted grin to a look of panic.

“What? How-h-ho-how-how did you know? Please sir, don’t take them away from me!!!” the old man cried out.

“Sir, stay the fuck back now. We’re not here to judge you. We’re here to execute these shitrats. Really dude? You think we’d do that?” Carter chimed back.

The old man began to panic. He had a wine bottle close by. Who were these people to judge? He loved these fluffies and out on the streets everyone looked out for each other. These fluffies had gotten him money, food. And he had made sure they were well fed, happy. He felt bad for what he put them through but it fed him. He needed food to keep these guys alive too. Not one person gave him money without the fluffies being close to him. No one had wanted to give him anything. These guys were here for the fluffies, not him. His grip on the bottle tightened, his chest felt hollow, he lunged forward.


Carter used the cattle prod on the old man. The man dropped to the floor shitting his pants and shaking. He couldn’t move now. He looked scared and he began to cry out. He begged them not to take the fluffies.

“Did you really have to do that?” Louie asked sternly to Carter.

“Dude would’ve got us with that fucking bottle. I’m here to be paid and to get some of these little suckers in the body bag” Carter replied nonchalantly.

The old man began to wail and cry once he heard the words “body bag”. Carter replied by zapping him again.

The fluffies began to crowd around and hugged their master. He was crying now, and his words grew quieter. They had begun to cry and begged the men not to harm them or their daddy anymore.

The male stepped out and blew out his cheeks. “Weve daddeh awone or get bad poopies an sowwy hoofies!!”
Carter looked at the male and laughed at him. He laughed hard.

And then he stomped on his head and his body repeatedly. “Fucking shitrat!!”, he then spat on its body. Blood and shit had exploded out of the body. It covered the old man who was whimpering and shaking.

The fluffies had seen this and wailed. Scary. They began to scatter, running slowly, their stubby legs couldn’t make them any quicker. The foals were even slower.

“We’ll talk about this later Carter. You go right and I’ll take the left. Put them in the bags and then put them into the dumpster for me.” Louie said coldly.

Louie wasn’t impressed with Carter’s conduct on the job so far. Carter may be a rich kid but he *worked with us grunts*.

Louie had seen it all before. Those who love to abuse fluffies take the job on thinking it’ll be fun killing these things brutally all the time. Carter was making a mess, a mess that can spread diseases. They killed cleanly on the job. Cleanly. And humanely.

The reputation of all exterminators had taken serious knocks because of the actions of a lot of the thrill seeking abuse lovers. Their actions were caught on camera. Many left the job after they grew bored killing them. Louie had even testified against men who had exterminated things *other than fluffies*. Carter was lumped with Louie. Louie had a good record of straightening guys out like this.

They bagged the fluffies who were squirming in the bags. The bags weren’t sealed and were now becoming filled with fluffy shit. The smell was pretty awful. The fluffies were begging for their lives now. They promised not to make anymore bad poopies and wanted huggies.

“Toss them into the dumpster and put on your gas mask” Louie said to Carter.

The bags full of fluffies were dumped in. “Observe” Louie then said. He pulled out 2 small canisters of the gas intended to kill the fluffies. They’d normally be put into a gas gun. But Louie had released the tops and threw the canister in and closed it over.

The fluffies who had been wailing about owies and being scared of the dark began to wail out. And then went silent. Louie ensured no one was around when he opened the dumpster. The gas was dangerous to people too.

The bags were retrieved from the dumpster. Carter was made to scrape the dead male from the floor. The carcasses were then taken to the back of the truck to be crushed into mulch. The final fate of the fluffies. The bags would be cleaned and recycled for use again.

Louie had found the old man who was still shaking on the floor. He really wanted to hit Louie but was powerless to do so. Louie put him against the wall and sat him up.
Louie then put a slip of paper in his pocket. A written warning from Environmental Health with a fine. Louie was just doing his job now. He knew full well the old guy couldn’t pay but the bigwigs really don’t give a fuck about people down here.

Both Carter and Louie drove off. They’d drop the truck off at processing and grab a bite to eat at the diner.

The old man couldn’t cry anymore. He was finished now. He couldn’t protect them, they loved him. His chest felt empty.

He heard one cry out before it was put in the bag. “Daddeh sabe fwaffy!! Pwee Daddeh. Wy Daddeh nu wub fwaffy nu mo Huhuhuhuhu”

He wanted to pick himself up, punch each of those assholes out. He couldn’t do it. The shock from that thing took him out. How had his heart not given out?

He could feel his fingers again. He felt so weak. That asshole shocked him again?! Bastard. But what he could do for the guys now? They’re gone now. Just like that. This was probably for the best, he hadn’t felt great himself lately. Punishment for letting the perverts have their way with the guys? Probably was. He’d had a bad life anyway. But those guys loved him no matter what. And they relied on him when no one believed in him before. And they loved him too.

His eyes began to wet. Tears dropped again. The last time. He could feel the shards of glass between his fingers. He needed to get them closer now……..

Carter had finished eating and decided to go for drinks. He’d had his ear chewed out by Louie. He took it on the chin, he only wanted to have a bit of fun. He promised he’d be more gentle with the public next time.

The diner were they both ate was a late night special. Not many people liked having exterminators on premises, their smell is a mix of fluffy and chemicals, but this diner had been pretty welcoming to Louie. He knew the old lady who ran the place and Jim-Bob met his wife here too.

Louie finished his bagels. And his cake. And was on his fifth cup of coffee. He peered out the window watching the street. He’d had little else that interested him. Is that a young man? A box. That can only mean one thing.

Louie picked himself up out of his chair and left Maxie a tip. He walked over to the alley and seen the young man running away when he seen him.

The box had fluffies inside. Young ones. The box had been used as a litterbox but wasn’t completely dirty. Bits of kibble that they were too young to eat was inside too. The foals themselves were fairly clean. Possibly cleaned by their mother? Well now they’ve been abandoned. They wouldn’t survive long without their mother.

It was against the law to dump fluffies in the city. A controversial bill was introduced to stop people from dumping them. Fluffies were treated as pollutants rather than as animals. You wouldn’t dump shit in the street right? People argued that fluffies were there property and it was their right to litter and discarded them. The judge laughed them off. Fluffies had dumped on his lawn.

This was introduced to clean up the city. If it did good, no one had noticed.

“Nyu daddeh?” A young one had peeped up at Louie. Then the others, 4 in all peeped up too and chirped.

“Not at all fluffies. But you must be scared to be out here?” Louie replied.

The most talkie babbeh chirped, “Pwee be nyu daddeh! A onwy wittwe babbeh”
The others peeped and chirped and asked for Mummeh, miwkies and huggies and Daddeh and wub oo.

Louie raised his eye brow. He read up something that foals were programmed with the “wittwe babbeh” defence as part of their speech. Foals that age aren’t exactly capable of sentences. It was meant to deter them from being harmed. It didn’t exactly work in stopping them from being harmed. If anything, it distressed their mothers more.

Louie checked them out. Eye health, fur and weight. Okay for a foal. Not great but not bad. They seemed to be healthy. Possibly born this week. Domesticated based on their cleanliness of fur. They haven’t been trained to use a corner to dump their faeces in. Definitely no vaccinations……..but there was hope for them. They were young after all.

“I won’t be your daddy. But I’ll take you to a place and you can have miwkies and huggies”

“Yaaay wub oo”

“No you don’t. The shelter isn’t far from here. Let’s go”

Louie drove down and passed the foals over. They’d be vaccinated and cleaned properly and given milk and a warm bed for the night. They were placed with a mare who had lost her foals before. She was told to make sure they got milkies and knew about the litter box. They were young and cute Louie was confident they’d find a home.

He wasn’t confident that it would be a good home or a bad one. Or whether he’d see them on the street again one day…...
Uploader Captain_Emo,
Tags tagme tagyourownshit
Locked No
Parent None
Rating Unknown


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Ah-Fwuffin-Wub-Gwittew: It's not ironic, it's unfortunate. Alanis listed shit for 3 minutes and all of it was unfortunate.